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09/10/2008 12:20 pm

With preschool in session, your child's social calendar is filled with birthday parties each weekend. His or her own birthday is just two months away. How can you compete with gymnastic bonanzas and fully catered events including professional entertainment Unfortunately our world is filled with competition. Sadly these competitions begin before the baby even arrives.

Birthdays are a time for celebration, not a time for keeping score. A few things that may happen when you focus more on keeping up with your friends than the celebrating your child.

1. You spend money without restraint which falsely sends the message that your child is entitled to these things

2. Trying to out-party your friends. Kids are mean and will drop your child if his party was better than theirs and that hurts.

3. Working parents sometimes try to compensate for their lack of time with expensive gifts. This too sends the wrong message.

Here are a few tips to help you structure a meaningful and fun-filled birthday celebration:

Make sure your party is age-appropriate.

If your child goes to preschool, invite the entire class. You don't want to send a message that it's OK to hurt someone's feelings.

Invite one best friend. Go to a movie or rent a video and make a special lunch and dessert together!

Plan an exercise party. Put a music or exercise video on and let each child take a turn leading the exercises. Serve cut up vegetables and fruit with several kinds of dip. What fun!

Plan a "book party". Instead of bringing a present, request that each child bring a book. Have them sit in a circle and ask each child to talk about the story. Make pretty cardboard bookmarks using craft supplies. Donate the books to a charity and let each child take their bookmark home. What a creative party favor!

Buy water bottles or sun visors at the dollar store. Put out glue, yarn, buttons, sequins, markers and let them decorate to their hearts content. Use this as their special party favor.

Make two cupcakes for each child and ask them to ice and decorate. Save one for a party favor. Put a candle on the others so everyone can blow them out together. A lot less mess than cake!

Have a family birthday celebration. There's no rule that says you have to invite the world. Family celebrations are sometimes the ones we remember the most with many Kodak moments!

Remember, the most important thing to give your child is your time no matter how short. It's better than all the toys in the world!

Blythe Lipman

For more fabulous information from Blythe, check out www.babyinstructions .com.


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