by Jenn Kaye

 

When we were kids and made a mistake, we had the ultimate freedom to yell (loudly, at the top of our lungs, mind you), "Do Over!" We knew that once we said those two magic words we had the ultimate power to recreate our experience in the way that we wanted it to be.

Then something happened. We grew up.

And with that, we somehow lost our magical ability to call-in the power of the "Do-Over." In years of working with my coaching clients, I have come to the realization that in truth, we did not "lose" our magical ability ... we have simply forgotten how to use it.

It's as if now that we are responsible "adults" the rules change. Our perception is that we must be 'mature,' and 'serious.' Think about the language we use in our communication - with ourselves and with others (often because it was communicated to us by someone else):

- What do you want to be when you grow up?

- You've done this enough times, you "should" know how to do this by now ...

- Well, I've made my bed. I guess I have to lay in it. (or You've made your bed and you're going to have to lay in it.)

- It's time you stopped behaving like a child.

- I can't believe I made such a huge mistake, AGAIN!

Eww!!! Doesn't reading that just make you feel icky?! (Yes, I said "icky.") It feels heavy, is wrought with expectation and resentment and just plain leaves us feeling "less than." It is precisely that feeling that insidiously creeps into our thoughts and affects the way we look at ourselves, our relationships and our communications.

To put things in perspective ... a "mistake" by definition is simply an undesired result correct? Well, that undesired result came about as a result of the choices we made. What if we simply reactivated the power of the "Do-Over" and made a different choice? Different choices yield different results.

I challenge you to take that 2x4, that baseball bat (or whatever you use to beat yourself up when you feel you have made a mistake) and send it for a time-out. You deserve more. More love. More understanding. More compassion. More practice. More fun. When you feel better about yourself, others benefit as a natural result. Your communications are more positive. Work is more productive. Relationships are more loving.

You are whole and perfect just as you are. When you remove the pressures of perfection, overwhelm and the concept that you no longer can be playful because you're a wife, a mom, an entrepreneur, etc. you give yourself permission to change your choices and your world.

I am here to tell you that you have just been given the gift of UNLIMITED Do-Over's. That's right. UNLIMITED. (Kind of like roll-over minutes, only better.) Use your power. Engage the magic. Have fun!

Did someone just call DO-OVER?!